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I love Jesus Christ and devote my life to following Him. I'm madly in love with my husband jon. I'm the mother of the most perfect babies in the world. I'm a Senior Sales Associate at my beloved Anthropologie. I'm a reader, thinker, lover, believer and traveler. I'd trade in the chicago skyline for the pacific coast any day. i love a good vino. i love my books. i'm creative as creativity goes but always wanted to be a painter. i prefer letter writing over emailing. And I always try to be a kinder person.

Friday, February 25, 2011

Another moment of honesty...





I'm in a rut...

...I'm tired.
...I'm overweight and because of this, none of my clothes fit well.
...I'm money conscious (who isn't? Still...I hate it)
...I'm still dealing with that crappy haircut I got.
...I have too much to do, and every time I do something, it's like someone hits rewind.
...I miss time with my husband.
...I have no time for myself, and I want to be selfish every once in awhile.
...I can't see well because my eyes changed after Judah, and for some reason, it costs an arm and a leg to fix this problem.
...my sweet Judah's schedule is proving to be one that requires me to stay home more. I hate staying home more.

I realize in the big picture, my problems are lame. People in the world are dealing with much much bigger things. But this is currently MY rut...and it's making me sad and tired.

Motherhood is the greatest gift I've ever been blessed with. My children are my heart...I love every tiny thing about them. But there is no doubt that raising them is hard. I remember writing a blog way back while I was pregnant with Judah about how I didn't think having two kids would be hard...ha!! I obviously didn't know what I was talking about. Raising two kids is considerably more work than raising one. Boy was I the fool. And to think...my kids are easy when compared to others!

I'm sure the winter has something to do with my rut. I have no where to walk...my kids are pent up in the house...it's claustrophobic. I can only hope that my rut disappears with this stupid winter. I could use some California sun right about now.

Sorry for the excessive rant...sometimes you just need to get it out to make it better.

1 comment:

The MacDonalds said...

love your honesty. sweet & perfect & truth. sometimes a rant is perfectly suitable:) i hear ya!